The League of Nations
I often get asked where my favourite places are. So here is my utterly (and irreverently) subjective list of my favourite nations in the world.
It is difficult to construct a list like this, as there are some things that drive me nuts about even my most favourite countries and some things I love about countries that drive me nuts. But take heart – this list is VERY top-heavy: If your country is in the top one hundred I love the place and can’t wait to go back. If you’re in the following fifty, I would heartily recommend your country to anyone who was feeling frisky or adventurous.
But, okay, if your country is in the bottom fifty, your country is probably has some serious issues. But, honestly, that says more about the government than it does the people… in fact, what are you doing reading this? Go out and ferment revolution!!!* 
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Rank |
Country |
Comments/Justification |
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1 |
Could it be? A country that knocks England off the top position? You better believe it folks – if you’re looking for a secret tropical island paradise, it doesn’t get any better than this. Shh… don’t tell everyone or they’ll ruin it! |
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2 |
Oh pretty England, you really have no idea how lucky you are. |
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3 |
Pyramids, pharaohs, temples, tombs and sphinxes: Egypt should be on everybody’s lists of places to see before they die. Just don’t let the touts get to you – laugh and shrug them off. |
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4 |
Salt plains, silver mines, jungle adventures, prisons run by the prisoners, the most dangerous road in the world: Bolivia is the nearest thing a backpacker will get to Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory. |
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5 |
Just the right mix of excitement, danger, beaches and cheap drinks. Dip me in chocolate and throw me to the ladyboys! |
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6 |
The countryside is gorgeous, the seafood is cheap, the women are stunning, they have lemurs that dance and everybody wears hats. What’s not to love?! |
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7 |
A surprisingly high entry considering how awful the government is, but the overwhelming hospitality of the people left me gobsmacked. I would return in a shot. |
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8 |
A beautiful little country, sadly about to get wiped off the map thanks to Man-Made Climate Change. If you know anybodywho thinks Global Warming is a hoax, please send them to Tuvalu – with any luck, they won’t know how to swim. |
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9 |
Tapas! Beer! Siesta! Tapas! Beer! Fiesta! |
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10 |
Oh come on, how could I not love a country called ‘Azerbaijan’? Best name for a country ever. |
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11 |
Another surprise entry considering the architecture is dreadful, the government require you to declare the colour of your underwear and the biggest banknote is worth tuppence, but again, it’s the amazing hospitality of the people that left me spellbound. |
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12 |
Packed with cities brimming with history, exquisite beauty and a countryside that will take your breath away. The scran ain’t half bad neither… |
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13 |
The birthplace of Homer, Plato, Herodotus and democracy. Go in spring for the wildflowers. Lovely!! |
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14 |
Whisky, haggis, Burns, rolling hills, that red-haired sexpot from Doctor Who… thinking about it, I don’t think there is anything about Scotland that I don’t like. Except maybe Alex Salmond. And George Galloway. And those total dicks who wear ‘anyone but England’ t-shirts at the World Cup. |
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15 |
As infuriating as it is colourful, India has to rank as the nuttiest place in the Alpha Quadrant. But that’s what makes it so much fun to visit! Plus they have the Taj Mahal. Now how about some Chai? |
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16 |
Beautiful beyond words. And that’s jus’ the ladieeees. |
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17 |
Being a typical Brit, I love to rip on France, but even I have to admit it’s a spectacular country and whatever they’re cookin’, I want some. |
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18 |
More fun than you can shake a stick at and my top pick for Central America. |
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19 |
A beautiful blessed isle filled with some of the bravest people in the world. Love it. |
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20 |
NZ gave me such a warm welcome that it’s now back in my top 20 and what those meanies said in Dubai is forgotten about. Kinda |
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21 |
Oh come on: where else on Earth can you blow up a cow with a bazooka (allegedly)?! |
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22 |
I spent a good deal of time in Fiji and with Fijians. I love the kava, I love the people, I love the spirit. I’ll be back!!! |
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23 |
Dubrovnik, Zagreb, Hvar: STUNNING. Just stunning. If you’re looking for a European holiday by the sea that isn’t going to cost you a kidney, Croatia is hard to top. |
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24 |
I fell in love with Samoa from the start, truly a place for an artist in search of tranquillity. |
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25 |
The old city in Quito is simply exquisite, and Ecuador is possibly the last place on Earth where you can still legally ride on the roof of a train. |
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26 |
Me and Denmark go back a long way and I love the bones of the place. If you can get to the Roskilde festival before you die, I suggest you do so. |
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27 |
Tonga may be small, but it’s a place with a big heart and a fascinating Viking-like history. |
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28 |
Ignoring their fetish for fermented cabbage for a moment, South Korea is undoubtedly one of the most fun and welcoming places on the planet. Ironic that north of the border should be one of the least. |
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29 |
A beautiful South Pacific paradise and home to the crazy land-divers of Pentecost Island. What’s not to love? |
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30 |
Probably my favourite place in sub-Saharan Africa – heartbreaking, beautiful, stoic. |
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31 |
A magical place set in the mountains of the Pamir ranges with the warmest hospitality you could imagine. And once you learn how to spell ‘Kyrgyzstan’ correctly you feel super-smart! |
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32 |
Frenetic, frantic and fun… and so goddamn cheap it makes my eyes water. 50 cents a beer? That’ll do nicely!! |
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33 |
Select Sigur Ros on your iPod and go climb a volcano in the land of the midnight sun. You won’t regret it. |
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34 |
Rwanda has picked itself up and dusted itself down since the 90s. It’s one of the few African states for whom I am hopeful for the future – and one of the few places on Earth you can see mountain gorillas in their natural environment. |
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35 |
I was in Brazil for the 2002 World Cup final. It was a hell of a party. My favourite Portuguese-speaking nation by a mile. |
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36 |
A difficult place to love, but all kinds of awesome in a really f—ked up way. |
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37 |
Tourists used to be advised to stay away from Burma as their money propped up the military junta, but with Aung San Suu Kyi now an elected official, it’s high time we gave this beautiful place another look. |
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38 |
A more chillaxed version of India and the gateway to the rooftop of the world. Nice! |
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39 |
Jungles, dancing, drinking, Mayan ruins… more wonderful Central Americana. |
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40 |
Probably one of the least stressed-out Islamic nations (possibly on account of all the kif), coupled with history and traditions that stretch back millennia, Morocco a slice of North Africa you’d be a fool to ignore. |
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41 |
Okay, so they’ve got some historical baggage and their taste in music leaves a lot to be desired, but they’re one of the few nations in the world to be rebuilding classic buildings and they love their beer, so Germany gets a big thumbs up from me. |
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42 |
Burkina Faso means ‘The Land of Honest Men’. And the capital is Ouagadougou, pronounced ‘Waggadoogoo’. What’s not to love? |
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43 |
Miles better than I thought it would be, and, for my money the best place for a holiday in Sub-Saharan Africa. |
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44 |
Great place, lovely people, cheap beer. That’s three thumbs up from me. I’ll be back!! Again! |
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45 |
Pokemon! Manga! Bukkake! Japan, you ROCK MY WORLD!!! |
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46 |
Doesn’t matter where I go in the world, there’s ALWAYS an Irish bar! You just can’t escape the craic… but why would you want to? |
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47 |
I can’t help but love Turkey – great food, ancient ruins and things that make you go woo!! |
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48 |
Hop on board your flying condor and go join the trail of the Mysterious Cities of Gold |
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49 |
One of the main things I love about Kiribati is that it is pronounced ‘kiri-bas’, seemingly with the intention of giving pedants like myself something to do. Although only 1% of it is land, Kiribati is the width of Australia and it straddles all four hemispheres. How cool is THAT? |
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50 |
Mmm… Sweden… Why do naughty thoughts pop into my head? I’m sure that’s a good thing though. |
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51 |
A beautiful island filled with beautiful people and beautiful cars. If you can go, go. |
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52 |
Although some of these paradise atolls were trashed by the Yanks testing their nuclear bombs, what remains is still well worth a visit. Its position slap bang in the middle of the Pacific Ocean made it the farthest reach of The Odyssey Expedition. |
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53 |
I had a great time in Indonesia – painting Jakarta red, too many nights out in Bali, travelling on the Pelni ferries… and the seafood in West Papua was to die for. |
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54 |
A quieter version of Thailand, but once the drink starts flowing it can live it up with the best of them. |
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55 |
I only set one foot in Jamaica, but it gets a high placement thanks to its wonderful musical tradition. |
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56 |
Familiarity can breed contempt, but in the case of Wales, the more I see of it the more I love. |
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57 |
Worth it just for Petra – The rose red city hewn from the rock of ages past – like nowhere else on Earth. |
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58 |
Ljubljana – as unforgettable as it is unpronounceable |
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59 |
Oman is my favourite of the Arabian peninsular countries. It’s cheap, laid-back and surprisingly fun. |
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60 |
A welcome break from the ham and cheese sandwiches of Latin America |
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61 |
Nothing compares with Mostar on a sunny day. |
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62 |
I said it would be an amazing place to visit… once the crackpot in charge dies. Well, he’s dead and so Libya scoots 100 positions up The League! |
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63 |
The Dominican Republic is the part of the Caribbean that dances to a spicy Latin beat and came as a welcome break from the fried chicken of the West Indies! |
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64 |
A beautiful interior, not too big, not to small. Safe and stable, an African country I wouldn’t hesitate to return to. |
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65 |
Jump on your inflatable donut and head downstream. More fun than you can shake a stick at! |
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66 |
I first visited Poland when I was 11 years old, less than a year after the fall of the Berlin Wall. A truly cracking place. |
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67 |
It’s sometimes the forgotten places of Earth that turn out to be the most friendly and beautiful. |
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68 |
CHECK IT OUT! The new Croatia. Get there before it becomes popular and secure them bragging rights. |
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69 |
I don’t smoke pot and miserable Russian prostitutes aren’t really my thing, but, trust me – there IS more to The Netherlands. |
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70 |
Taiwan is a great place full of wonderful people. However, somebody there (who was NOT Taiwanese) stole my hat, so I can’t put it any higher, sorry. |
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71 |
Is Prague my favourite Central European city? I better Czech… |
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72 |
It would be wrong to have one without the other. |
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73 |
I get a warm fuzzy feeling when I think of Canada – big coats and hot chocolate. Lovely. It should be in my top 20, but it gets marked down for inflicting Bryan Adams, Celine Dion, Avril Latrine, Alanis Morrissette and Justin GODDAMN Bieber on the world. Why Canada Why? |
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74 |
A really great place that not many people have been to, the Solomon Islands are a forgotten gem of the South Pacific. |
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75 |
I genuinely love Serbia, and I’m not just saying that because of the death threats that ensue from crazy mono-browed Serbian ex-pats if I don’t. Chill my friends: the war is over, you were the bad guys and you lost. But hey – look on the bright side, you could have won. |
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76 |
One place in the world where you’ll be made to feel proud for being British. I’ll definitely be coming back one day. |
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77 |
Egypt’s quieter, more sensible little brother. Gets extra points for doubling as Tattooine in Star Wars. |
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78 |
Romania is great. Hell, they’ve got Dracula’s Castle, what more do you need? |
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79 |
A welcome respite from the lunacy that is West and Central Africa. |
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80 |
I’ve only been to one of the four states of the Federated States of Micronesia, but what I saw I liked. I liked a lot. |
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81 |
Massive lake, beautiful landscape, slightly unhinged government. |
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82 |
Do your best to avoid Hezbollah and I guarantee you an awesome time in Lebanon…awesome kebabs and mountains that cascade down to the sea. Nice! |
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83 |
Great little place, very nice policemen. |
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84 |
Yeah, the government is a brigade of nasty little tyrants and facebook is banned, but the history is vast and fascinating, the calligraphy is beautiful and damn the food is good. |
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85 |
Gets extra credit for making people believe that Hitler was from Germany and Mozart was from Austria when it was the other way around. Altogether now: OOOOOOOO VIENNA!! |
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86 |
Great place, good food, lovely people. |
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87 |
The people I warmed to most in West Africa were all from Ghana. Would have been nice to hit the interior. |
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88 |
More stunning Eastern European landscapes. Gets extra points for being named after a womble. |
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89 |
A magical land hidden away in the mountains of South Africa, well recommended. |
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90 |
A ridiculous little place filled with some of the coolest people on the planet. I loved every second of it. |
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91 |
Santiago’s dramatic Andean backdrop is a just to behold, and if you like coastlines, Chile is nothing BUT a coastline! |
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92 |
Booze may be outlawed, but there is ALWAYS a house party to go to. I love house parties. |
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93 |
Plucky little Kosovo is fighting to get back on top. Hopefully a happy end to a sad story. |
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94 |
Budapest is great, but given the choice I (slightly!) prefer Vienna. Sorry Attila. |
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95 |
Nothing will ever compare to the cold beer that Dino, Dan and I shared in Palmyra. Let’s hope they topple their rotten tyrant dictator sooner rather than later. |
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96 |
Sadly embroiled in a massive Drug War at the moment (which killed more people in 2010 than were killed in Afghanistan or Iraq), but stay away from the ‘no-go’ zones and you should have a great time. |
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97 |
Really really cool people, a nice sleepy place hidden away in the Caribbean. |
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98 |
I may not like the ruling dynasty, but hanging out with the Bwiti Tribe made the slog through Nigeria and Cameroon all worth while. |
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99 |
Kenya is the giant of East Africa, a land that is a rich and varied as it’s people are warm and welcoming. Plus they’ve got a seriously nifty flag. |
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100 |
Like Filipinos and South Koreans, the Fins have but one mission when a strange wanders into their midst: get them as drunk as possible. And that could never be a bad thing! |
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101 |
Vilnius is a beautiful little gem, well worth the EasyJet ticket. |
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102 |
I passed through Latvia at night, but if it’s anything like Latvia, I like it already. |
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103 |
Annoyed me a little by taking me off the train and taking me to the doctor, so gets a couple of points knocked off its score. |
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104 |
Respect to East Timor for successfully breaking away from Indonesia, and for having such a groovy flag! |
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105 |
Great weather, turquoise waters and stunning beaches spoilt by bad American dancing and fake boobs. |
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106 |
Definitely worth a visit, Ethiopia is the only place that wasn’t mucked up by us lot in Europe with our silly hats and even sillier moustaches. |
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107 |
Sub-Saharan Africa’s one (and only) success story. No wars, no kleptomaniac dictators, no apartheid – 44 years of free and fair elections. IT CAN BE DONE!! |
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108 |
Wonderful place – check out my name on the wall in The Keg and Marlin! |
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109 |
Too expensive!! But worth it if you love His Dark Materials. |
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110 |
Australia used to be in my top ten, but now it’s just too freakin’ expensive. It’s like $12 for a single pint of their crappy lager. And they make you apply for a visa. Sorry, Oz – you slip 100 places. |
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111 |
Whilst the Israeli government doesn’t always do what’s best for the region (or Israel itself for that matter), it’s well worth a visit. |
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112 |
A groovy place to hang your hat for a few weeks. |
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113 |
A really cool place – Tbilisi has some stunning architecture hidden amongst the soviet tat and the people are great. Just don’t propose a toast using a pint of beer…! |
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114 |
CHOCOLATE. BEER. What more does a weary traveller require? |
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115 |
The last great mysterious mountain kingdom. Respect! |
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116 |
I’m not rich and I not famous, but even if I was… YAWN. |
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117 |
Mostly harmless. |
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118 |
I spent about 5 seconds in Russia before running back like a frightened deer, but my word St. Petersburg looks amazing. On the telly. |
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119 |
An otherwise dull oil state enriched by its wonderful people. |
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120 |
Worth it just to have Jerudong Playground all to yourself. |
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121 |
Hats and canals and cooooool. |
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122 |
Got plus points for the incredible guys who worked at the shipping agency, got a big minus when that policeman tapped me for a $20 bribe. |
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123 |
The jewel in West Africa’s tattered crown. Worth returning to. |
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124 |
I really didn’t spend enough time there, but from what I can gather Mongolia is exactly and brilliantly what you’d expect. |
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125 |
The only place on Earth you’ll see Masai warriors in their full get-up working as bouncers outside an Irish Bar. That alone makes it worth the trip. |
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126 |
A quick border hop, so I shouldn’t say, but seems a lot less fun than Spain. |
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127 |
Found it quite unwelcoming after basking in the warmth of Latin America. |
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128 |
Bit of an awkward place to stick a country, don’t you think? |
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129 |
Fell out of love with Ukraine when they dropped the ‘The’. |
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130 |
Good to know about for pub quizzes and that’s about it. |
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131 |
Fun place, too many KFCs though, even for me. |
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132 |
A lot of other backpackers rave about Argentina, and while I’ve never have a bad time there, I’ve never had cause to get excited about the place either. Maybe next time! |
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133 |
Mmm, beautiful, beautiful islands. Worth it. |
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134 |
It’s okay. |
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135 |
Bridgetown was splendid but in danger of becoming a little sterile. |
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136 |
Nice place you’re got here. |
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137 |
Famous for Borat and rocket launches. If you can get a visa (they don’t make it easy!), I reckon Kazakhstan is well worth a visit. |
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138 |
The smallest nation state of the UN by population, Nauru is a noteworthy tale of environmental catastrophe and economic disaster. But the people are so lovely, it’s hard not to be moved by their plight. |
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139 |
Not immensely appealing, but I never made it out of the capital. |
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140 |
Gets marked down for not being on a railway and for killing Ayrton Senna. |
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141 |
A lovely island, but overrun by the mega-rich. |
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142 |
An Arabian pleasure palace for hypocritical Saudis. But if you like Filipino cover bands… |
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143 |
Alas, a short border hop. Looked fun though. |
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144 |
My least problematic of the African ex-Portuguese colonies! |
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145 |
A little too overdeveloped. Preferred the Grenadines. |
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146 |
Buzzed through but it managed to put a smile on my face. |
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147 |
Twice I have dipped my toe into Albania. One day I’ll make it an entire foot. |
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148 |
Chewing gum is banned? Eek! Too much like the sterile world of ‘Demolition Man’ for my liking. |
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149 |
One day Algeria will be BACK!, but not today. |
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150 |
A sterile place, wonderful for ex-pats looking to make a ton of money (tax-free!), but scratch beneath the glittery surface and you’ll find there’s little underneath. |
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151 |
They’ve had 25 coup d’etats since the late 70s, and at any one time they have 4 presidents. Which is why they call it cloud Coup-Coup Land. Lovely people, though. |
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152 |
Don’t know why the pope needs to live in a fortress. Smacks of insecurity to me. |
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153 |
Didn’t hang around long enough for an objective opinion, but seemed okay. |
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154 |
Mmm… I love the desert, do you think they’re going to have that referendum anytime soon? |
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155 |
I missed the point. I’ll find it one day. |
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156 |
Was okay, but didn’t have the warmth of Sierra Leone. |
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157 |
The USSR is alive and well and living in Belarus. |
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158 |
Apart from that fantastic name, I don’t know what else to say about Chad. |
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159 |
A silly angry place full of silly angry people. But it’s getting better. |
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160 |
A truly wonderful country which was sadly ruined for me by less-than-wonderful policemen. |
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161 |
Could have a bright future, but I’m not holding my breath. |
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162 |
A country awaking from a nightmare. Let’s hope it never goes back to sleep. |
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163 |
The two things Senegal has going for it are women and the Casamance. The rest of it is meh. |
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164 |
GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER CYPRUS, and I’ll put you in my top 20. |
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165 |
Given the prevalence of voodoo, there is plenty of scope for excitement, but I didn’t see it. |
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166 |
The thing with Afghanistan is that it’s only really worth visiting to say you went there and didn’t die. That’s not really what you want to see on the tourist literature, is it? |
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167 |
A trifle dull if you’re not there to ski. |
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168 |
I’m still peeved that they charged me $50 for a damn transit visa! Up yours, Uganda!! |
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169 |
Another African country damned by the utterly stupid borders drawn up by the Europeans in the 1880s. |
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170 |
I honestly don’t know enough about CAR to have an informed opinion, but the border guards were friendly. |
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171 |
If you’ve never even heard of Tajikistan, there may be a reason for that…! |
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172 |
The size of Europe, the economy of Jamaica. Go figure. |
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173 |
Corrupt on an inter-planetary scale, no electricity, dangerous drivers, email scams, religious conflict, suicide bombers… let’s just say that Nigeria is best avoided for now. |
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174 |
Wow! Angola is the most expensive place in the WORLD! And it’s dead hard to get in. |
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175 |
A country sadly but entirely vandalised by the Soviets. |
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176 |
Beautiful desertscape marred by a distinctly ugly lack of human rights. They only made slavery illegal in the 1970s |
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177 |
Dhaka has to be the filthiest city in the world, I wouldn’t really bother. |
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178 |
Devilishly hot, horrifically expensive and bereft of character. |
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179 |
In a place like Sudan, it’s quicker to ask what went right instead of going through everything that has gone wrong. The leader is already wanted for war crimes and a full-on war with South Sudan looks more likely by the day. |
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180 |
An impoverished nation which will one day struggle out of its shell and be no doubt awesome. But not today. |
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181 |
A place with an extremely bad press, although my experience was limited to Iraqi Kurdistan (which I quite enjoyed) – travel to Baghdad is still not advised. As the Iraq Lonely Planet says ‘you’ll have to be mad’. |
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182 |
An otherwise boring oil state which is only made interesting by the bizarre legacy of Turkmenbashi, its utterly cuckoo first president. |
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183 |
A sad story of hell in paradise. |
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184 |
They have oil – they don’t want you, so why bother? |
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185 |
A beautiful country, by all accounts, sadly run by a modern-day Hitler, so I cannot recommend until he’s gone. |
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186 |
Provides the banking for the most evil men in the world and Toblerones go up your nose when you bite them. |
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187 |
I spent a few days in the capital Asuncion a few years ago and it really didn’t appeal. |
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188 |
A nasty little police state. The people are nice, but the government and police/army are horrible, even by West African standards. |
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189 |
Objectively the worst place in the world – the only place the FCO website tells you NOT to visit any part of. Although I would warmly recommend a trip to Somaliland in the north. |
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190 |
There’s no pithy comment I can make about the Palestinian situation, it’s far too complex. I just wouldn’t want to live there. |
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191 |
Sadly infested with right-wing religious nutcases, Yemen would otherwise be the most beautiful part of the entire Arabian peninsular. |
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192 |
I guess it’s an interesting place to visit, but the humour of the situation quickly wears thin when you consider the suffering inflicted on the Korean people for no good reason other than their last three leaders have been from a family of utter psychopaths. |
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193 |
Change is taking place (very slowly), and I had a good time there, but Saudi Arabia will always be ground zero for some of the most stupid, angry, violent and unreasonable people on the planet. |
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194 |
“And what will you say about Congo?” asked the police after locking me up for six days without my shoes, glasses or anti-malarials. I’ll say it’s the best place in the world… |
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195 |
No. |
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196 |
Well, I said that Pakistan would get worse before it gets better and gee whizz, it looks like *SURPRISE!* they were sheltering Osama Bin Laden all along. What a shower of bums. |
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197 |
The USA used to be in my top ten, on account of all the great TV, films, music and pornography it gives the world. And for also inventing the Internet. And TV. And Rock n’ Roll. And bikinis. But as punishment for the stupid new rule that forces British citizens to pay $100 for a visa, the USA is now officially THE WORST COUNTRY IN THE WORLD (according to me)!! Woohahahahahaha! |
*Kudos the people of Tunisia, Egypt, Libya, Syria, Bahrain and Yemen for doing exactly that!
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Hey, at least it wasn’t an American that stole your hat.
Well, probably.
Nice, I was hoping for an update of this list.
Shame that my country (Australia), has dropped considerably.
Ah, don’t worry Cody, as soon as your economy crashes, you’ll be back in the top ten!!